All Quiet on the Orient Express

All Quiet on the Orient Express is a hilariously surreal novel set in the Lake District.

It is the end of the summer. The tourists have already gone, and now the sun is abandoning the Lake District’s damp valleys.Only a lone camper remains, enjoying the quiet. He plans to stay just long enough to prepare for a trip to the East. But then the owner of the campsite asks him to paint a fence and he innocently obliges. Soon other odd jobs pile up until little by little he becomes ensnared in the ominous ‘out-of-season’.